All Things Raymond

I have not written anything in quite a while but it is time to get back to it and lately the thought of letting the uncontrollable control you has been on my mind. I know that sounds a little out there and may not make complete sense to you but just think about it for a few minutes. Remember that time your car broke down and you got so angry you started kicking your tire and throwing an adult fit in the street, or how about the time you lost your job due to circumstances that were by far out of your control but you insisted on sitting on the couch and eating bon bons while feeling bad for yourself and in turn that would be allowing that uncontrollable situation to control you… Feel free to tell me if I am out of line when saying that we all do this at some point or another.

Allowing something to “control” you can be interpreted in many ways, maybe you are controlled physically, mentally or emotionally. Now if you are reading this and you just said to yourself, ” wow, you are right, something is controlling me” I am going to confess now that I am not going to be uncovering some long-lost answer as to how to solve this problem. My thoughts about this lead more to forcing ourselves to shed light onto the areas we are allowing to be controlled and maybe take a shot at figuring out why exactly we allow things to control us in that way. I know that sometimes I allow things that I have no control over like, when something is going to happen or when I am going to receive something control me both mentally and physically. For instance, something as simple as a package that you are waiting for sometimes controls people. Think about the last time you were excited about a recent purchase and you did not have a tracking number. You probably waited around your house instead of going to take care of other things just pacing and wondering… When is it going to be here while looking out the window every time you hear a large truck go by. I don’t care what you say, that is a form of being controlled by the uncontrollable.

What about more important things in life… Like, your bills, your marriage, your job, your kids. All of these things have the necessary things that we deal with and work for, but what about those things you cannot control, come on don’t draw a blank on me now.. That unexpected bill that came in the mail, that disagreement you had with your spouse, that raise you have been waiting for at work or those tantrums your kids have been throwing. Now I know some of these sound like controllable situations but when you really think about it they are not. I know that I have dealt with every single one of these situations and I may not have handled them the best but I know that I allowed them to control me in one way or another.

This is another one of those topics that can be taken in multiple ways and I want to make it clear that I am not in any way saying to just lay down and let all these situation just take you over and not do anything about them because that is obviously not the case. I guess what I am getting at is that it seems to me that it would be more beneficial to our handling the issue at hand if we actually determine the effect it is having on us. If you know that  you are allowing something to control you to the point of distraction there has got to be a reason why that specific issue has such a gripping effect on you.

To me it seems the hardest part of allowing something to control you is when you actually realize that something is controlling you. What happens then? Do we allow the fact that we are allowing something to control us consume us thus allowing that to control us as well. It is like a vicious cycle and if we do not actually take the reins and push through allowing ourselves to be controlled the cycle will continue. How do you break the cycle you ask? I have no idea, we are all different and we all handle thing differently but like I mentioned before, I think recognizing that we are allowing this is the first step to no longer allowing it. In those moments when you feel like you are being consumed and you can’t do anything about it, step back and look at just what is causing those feelings. It is all too easy to be controlled by the uncontrollable and is much harder to actually look at your situation and control the controllable which in turn may alter what was at one point uncontrollable. As you can tell, this topic is a complete flood of random thoughts I have had lately about being controlled by the uncontrollable and when I stopped to think about it these are the things that came to mind. You may think this is the most random pile of words you have seen come up on your screen in a very long time but I am willing to bet of you got this far, you have some thoughts of your own now, so take the time to click that comment button and “Turn Your Thoughts Inside Out.”

Raymond